The Pastime Formerly Known as Sex

Someone called me a prude once.  I can totally see why.  Being around strange, naked or half-naked people makes me uncomfortable.  I feel awkward talking about sex and avoid using most terms (including sex).  I mean, really.  For a blog about getting pregnant, go back and count how many times I've used the word sex.  I'm sure its surprisingly low given the topic.

But I'm going to put my adult hat on for a few minutes so I can share something that's been weighing on my mind.  If you know me in a capacity such that you don't want to know anything about my sex life, you can stop reading now.

I was watching a show last night called "Sex: How it Works."  They talked about how necessary it is to survival, not only of human-kind but of our individual lives.  The connection it gives you with your partner is unbelievable.  The stress that is relieved through sex is incredible.  Not to mention its amazingly fun. :)

Since we've started trying to conceive, though, sex has changed.  It is now referred to as baby-making because that is its purpose.  Not to say that its become all scientific and boring like some people warn will happen.  On the contrary, they have been the most romantic experiences.  Its just different when you know you could be creating life.  I think the emotional impact of something so monumental is almost detrimental to every day life, though.

Regular, fun sex (as opposed to baby-making) just doesn't happen as often.  We're so caught up in the timing and the excitement, that we forget we can have sex when I'm not able to get pregnant.  Here's the typical schedule:

Last week of the month -  have sex at least once a day when ovulating  **fun, romantic, exciting**
Two weeks - waiting to find out if I'm pregnant  **exciting, nerve-wracking, a little scary**
Days before missed period - take pregnancy test  **disappointment**
Next two weeks - researching ways to increase fertility and putting them in action  **motivated, stressed**
..Repeat..

This baby-making process has been consuming us.  We took a step back two nights ago and realized what we were doing.  This is supposed to be fun and exciting.  Of course its disappointing when the test comes back negative, but we make whatever adjustments are needed and get back up (pun totally intended).  I think we've got this figured out now; I'm just hoping we can keep the excitement going for as long as it takes to finally make a baby.

(Sorry, Mom.)